365 days ago, i lost someone very important to me.
15th May 2015 at 5:25pm, i lost my Father (He's my Grandad, but i call him Father). I don't quite know how a year as gone by already because it doesn't hurt any less than it did the day he went to sleep. There are so many occasions when i almost forget for a moment, i walk into my nans expecting him to be sat at the table with his radio on too loud and reading his paper and then it hits me all over again.
The worst is going to the cemetary, it sounds bizarre but i used to find the cemetary to be a really peaceful place but now i avoid it where possible because seeing his name in the headstone freaks me out, it's a constant reminder and it's literally carved in stone so it's unavoidable. It scares me how much losing someone can hurt - i know he's out there somewhere, watching over me but i'd do anything just to see him one more time. He's always been such a prominent figure in my life that the thought of never seeing him again, breaks my heart.
I don't really know where im going with this post, it scares me a little bit just how fast time is flying by, i guess when your little you never really notice - i remember when the six weeks holidays for summer used to feel so long and now six weeks is nothing, it goes by in a blink. I almost feel like at the age of 25 i should have acheived so much but realistically, everything i assumed i'd have or i'd have done by now hasn't happened as expected.
I miss you everyday pops, my world just isn't the same without you.